Joke contest
5 posters
Page 1 of 1
Joke contest
by Admin Thu Aug 14, 2008 6:31 pm
You are allowed to post only one joke in 24 hours. Posting more than 1 within 24 hours will be deleted.
Contest ends 20th August 2008
Contest ends 20th August 2008
Admin- Administrator
-
Number of posts : 399
Age : 36
Mood : Love
Reputation :
Registration date : 2008-07-13 -
A very faithful woman
by joint Thu Aug 14, 2008 7:29 pm
An elderly lady was well-known for her faith and for her boldness in talking about it. She would stand on her front porch and shout "PRAISE THE LORD!"
Next door to her lived an atheist who would get so angry at her proclamations he would shout, "There ain't no Lord!!"
Hard times set in on the elderly lady, and she prayed for GOD to send her some assistance. She stood on her porch and shouted "PRAISE THE LORD. GOD I NEED FOOD!! I AM HAVING A HARD TIME. PLEASE LORD, SEND ME SOME GROCERIES!!"
The next morning the lady went out on her porch and noted a large bag of groceries and shouted, "PRAISE THE LORD."
The neighbor jumped from behind a bush and said, "Aha! I told you there was no Lord. I bought those groceries, God didn't."
The lady started jumping up and down and clapping her hands and said, "PRAISE THE LORD. He not only sent me groceries, but He made the devil pay for them. Praise the Lord!"
Next door to her lived an atheist who would get so angry at her proclamations he would shout, "There ain't no Lord!!"
Hard times set in on the elderly lady, and she prayed for GOD to send her some assistance. She stood on her porch and shouted "PRAISE THE LORD. GOD I NEED FOOD!! I AM HAVING A HARD TIME. PLEASE LORD, SEND ME SOME GROCERIES!!"
The next morning the lady went out on her porch and noted a large bag of groceries and shouted, "PRAISE THE LORD."
The neighbor jumped from behind a bush and said, "Aha! I told you there was no Lord. I bought those groceries, God didn't."
The lady started jumping up and down and clapping her hands and said, "PRAISE THE LORD. He not only sent me groceries, but He made the devil pay for them. Praise the Lord!"
joint- V.I.P
- Number of posts : 75
Age : 39
Location : LL
Mood : Great
Reputation :
Registration date : 2008-08-04 -
Re: Joke contest
by ptcuser Fri Aug 15, 2008 2:14 am
According to a news report, a certain private school in Washington was
recently faced with a unique problem. A number of 12-year-old girls were
beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. That was
fine, but after they put on their lipstick, they would press their lips to the
mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints.
Every night the Custodian would remove them, and the next day the
girls would put them back.
Finally the principal decided that something had to be done. She called
all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the Custodian. She
explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the
custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night (you can just imagine
the yawns from the little princesses).
To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, she asked
the Custodian to show the girls how much effort was required.
He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet, and cleaned
the mirror with it.
recently faced with a unique problem. A number of 12-year-old girls were
beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. That was
fine, but after they put on their lipstick, they would press their lips to the
mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints.
Every night the Custodian would remove them, and the next day the
girls would put them back.
Finally the principal decided that something had to be done. She called
all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the Custodian. She
explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the
custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night (you can just imagine
the yawns from the little princesses).
To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, she asked
the Custodian to show the girls how much effort was required.
He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet, and cleaned
the mirror with it.
ptcuser- Amateur Clicker
- Number of posts : 41
Age : 35
Reputation :
Registration date : 2008-08-12
Re: Joke contest
by lucaskent Fri Aug 15, 2008 4:48 pm
one fine morning a husband stood naked infront of the mirror and started praising himself
2 inches forward and i will b the king
then suddenly his wife came into the room and said 2 him
2 inches backward and you will b the queen..........
2 inches forward and i will b the king
then suddenly his wife came into the room and said 2 him
2 inches backward and you will b the queen..........
lucaskent- Champion Clicker
- Number of posts : 108
Age : 35
Mood : Great
Reputation :
Registration date : 2008-08-12 -
Re: Joke contest
by neon08 Fri Aug 15, 2008 11:19 pm
Dumbest kid in the World??
A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer, "This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you."
The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, "Which do you want, son?"
The boy takes the quarters and leaves.
"What did I tell you?" said the barber. "That kid never learns!"
Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store. "Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?"
The boy licked his cone and replied, "Because the day I take the dollar, the game's over!"
EDIT: CONTEST WINNER
A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer, "This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you."
The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, "Which do you want, son?"
The boy takes the quarters and leaves.
"What did I tell you?" said the barber. "That kid never learns!"
Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store. "Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?"
The boy licked his cone and replied, "Because the day I take the dollar, the game's over!"
EDIT: CONTEST WINNER
neon08- V.I.P
-
Number of posts : 185
Age : 46
Reputation :
Registration date : 2008-08-09
Page 1 of 1
Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum|
|
|